I hoped I would have a little girl someday. And now I have THREE. As they grow, so do my hopes. I hope I instill confidence in them to know that they are strong, capable, and important. I hope they know that they are dearly loved not only by me, their father, and our friends and family but also by an Almighty God who will never leave nor forsake them. I hope that I can model that love for them with my life. I hope that they allow their faith to be an anchor for their souls.
What comes to mind when you think of a "hot mess" mom? I picture a woman with a baby on her hip, cheerios stuck to her shirt, shouting at her kids while they grab items off the grocery store shelf. Sometimes, I am that mom. My guess is, so are you. Some days you might see me and think, "She looks like she has it all together."Other days you might see me and think, "Oh goodness, someone get that woman some coffee and a hairbrush."Some days I feel "well and balanced." Some days I feel like a hot mess. The fact is, I'm both.
“Stop doing anything that doesn’t make you happy. Life’s too short to be unhappy.”I’ve seen this sentiment (or a version of it) popping up on social media for years. There’s a good chance that I have shared it myself. I’ve certainly spoken words with the same general meaning. Recently, I started thinking more about this advice. Should we really stop doing anything that doesn’t make us happy? My short answer: No.
After writing out this post’s title, I resisted the temptation to type “I don’t” and end it all right there. But the truth is, I do have a level of organization to my home that I’m pretty proud of, all things considered. I am NOT a super organized person. I am that person who arranges a closet and makes it look amazing, only to get lazy with whatever system I put into place and have everything out of order a week or two later. I get ambitious with my tidying, only to realize later that it isn’t sustainable. Second of all, as I said in the title, I have three…
Mom guilt—Just thinking about those words brings a flurry of uneasy feelings to my gut."Mom guilt" seems to be a universal experience. But why? Why do we all feel the same negative emotions surrounding the job that we are doing raising our little humans? For example, I feel guilty whenever I discipline my children. Was I too harsh? Will this punishment work? Should I be trying positive reinforcement? Will this make them question my love for them? But whenever I don’t discipline them when I feel it’s deserved, I feel guilty about that too. Am I being permissive? Am I letting them walk all over me? Will they end up…
How do you start working out in the morning when you're a mom? You know you should exercise. You know it would help you feel good about yourself, improve your mood, and increase your energy levels. And you could really use some extra energy to chase after your kids all day. But when you're a mom, it can be hard to find the time to exercise. Come on—some days, it can be hard to find time to sleep or use the bathroom, let alone work out. And when you make the time, you're interrupted by crying or nagging requests for snacks. So, how do we get around these roadblocks? The…
You won't be everyone's cup of tea. Do you like tea? Personally, I prefer coffee. That doesn't mean there is anything wrong with tea— I just don't like it. Like tea, you’re not for everyone. That’s meant to be good news. You're not meant to please everyone. Maybe you’ve been making every effort to make everyone like you, and yet, there are still people who don’t.
The comparison game and mom guilt go hand-in-hand. But it isn’t just our parenting skills that most of us are comparing to others around us. It’s everything. Our bodies, our hair, our makeup skills, our bank accounts, our houses, our kids’ behavior, and skills. It’s a never-ending list, right?
This next season calls for release and growth. I feel prepared and unprepared all at once. That's parenthood and that's life, right? It's beautiful and terrifying and utterly confusing. I'm choosing to greet this season with gratitude for all that I have, for all that's to come, and for all that I have enjoyed so much that it's so very difficult to let go. As Winnie the Pooh says, "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
Suicide is a subject I never thought I'd find myself writing about. But after seeing its effects in the lives of those around me, hearing on the news about celebrities taking their own lives, and just recently watching the show "13 Reasons Why," it's a topic that's been on my mind. The question that keeps coming to my mind is: How can I help?